Article Content Provider’s Chris McElroy | Namecritic Scams

Steam Coming Out Ears Of Bunny Boiler Namecritic

Posted in Cringeworthy by namecriticscam on February 2, 2009

Serial scammer and entreprenuer-wannabie Chris McElroy’s got lots cooking.  Not only is Chris’ business on life support, but his girlfriend opted to kiss and tell. If that’s not enough, his best buddy is extremely annoyed Chris is costing him business, and he has got a part-time job that pays a meager $5.20 an hour.

Namecritic may struggle to get an erection, but if he doesn't have any problem getting angry.

Namecritic may struggle to get an erection, but he doesn't have any problem getting angry.

Chris has got angry with his ex-girlfriend. Cyndi (pictured here) and Chris broke up because Chris couldn’t accept that she wanted to sleep with other boys at the same time as they were seeing each other. Cyndi thought Chris was being too protective, so she called things off. Following the tragic breakup, Cyndi got in touch with Namecritic Scam to explain the amazing two week journey that the two star-crossed lovers shared. We revealed this to our readers in an exclusive interview with Cyndi.

Naturally, Namecritic ain’t happy that she decided to spill the beans. Now Chris’ failure to get an erection makes him blush; his church buddies now know god comes second only to his shrivled pen-s; and his family and friends think he’s going through an old age crisis, choosing to date someone who is literally young enough to be his granddaughter based on the US age of consent.

Today, in an exclusive with Namecritic Scam, Cyndi has revealed the “tirade of abuse” she has received at the hands of Chris. This, not suprisingly, has contained another bout of empty legal threats from the boy who has cried wolf many a time before. What’s wrong Chris? Too much of a fu–king pussy? Oh wait, it’s probably because you earn $5.20 an hour and couldn’t afford it.

Cyndi has now changed her telephone number after Chris told her to get us to remove our post within 72 hours. Weeks after lavishing her with superlatives, and taking her out for dinner, Chris has now resorted to calling her an “ugly b-tch”. When asked by Namecritic Scam if this hurt her feelings, she replied:

If he didn’t think I was hot, why would he want to date me in the first place? He is just trying to make me feel bad about myself; he’s being a bunny boiler as usual.

After you’re finished boiling bunnies, Chris, you’ve got a business to get off the ground.

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Whoopsadaisy

Posted in Cringeworthy by namecriticscam on January 23, 2009
A book containing a tip or two for Chris

A book containing a tip or two for Chris

Namecritic is an SEO, so it’s hilarious that he’s being destroyed in the search engine rankings for his own name, Chris McElroy, by a Realtor. What’s that little bit funnier is that we’re outranking him for his own name too! He obviously doesn’t know what he is doing when it comes to SEO, but does he know what he is doing when it comes to domains?

Well, there is certainly evidence to the contrary. Chris claims to have got started in the domain industry business 12 years ago, earning the moniker “Namecritic” for his sharp eye and worldly perspective on the domain industry. Or, so he likes to tell people!

Today I got thinking: why on earth doesn’t Chris own chrismcelroy.com or christophermcelroy.com? You would think such an early entrant into the domain industry would have thought this to be obvious. But, nope. He never got around to it. What makes it worse is that he could have picked up christophermcelroy.com in 2007. Not everyone wants to own their name dot com; but with an ego the size of Chris McElroy’s, it’s hard to imagine why not.

Tidlywinks, it’s time to sharpen up.

A Textbook Example Of Incomepetence

Posted in Cringeworthy by namecriticscam on January 21, 2009

Around a week ago someone tried to reset the password for this blog and our Google Mail account. We are up against self-professed technology experts, and this is the best they could do! Stupid or incompetent, Chris and Chuck have to learn to move with the times. Resetting passwords manually worked great when everyone used their surname as their password. Most people stopped using tactics like that in 1985. Failure, after failure, after failure. Your luck, Chris, could be about to change.

I know your struggling to get by and you’re feeling down in the dumps after splitting up with the love of your life, but why not treat yourself to a nice book? This could hold the keys to you getting your reputation back on track!

Recommended reading for Namecritic

Recommended reading for Namecritic

Chris McElroy Dates 19 Year Old For 2 Memorable Weeks

Posted in Cringeworthy by namecriticscam on January 10, 2009
Chris McElroy's little birdy

Chris McElroy's little birdy

Well, Mr McElroy has been a busy boy. Not content with writing articles, deploying scams, and working for assistantforrealestate.com, Chris found a girlfriend. 19 year old Cyndi wasn’t happy with the way things ended, and has been in touch with Namecritic Scam to fill us in with the latest gossip. Chris McElroy was unavailable for comment.

Chris “made love” to her around 6 times during their relationship that lasted only 13 days. During that time he wined and dined her, and even found time to show off to her about his business. He told her that he was an internet celebrity and he has his own “successful internet marketing business”. What a catch, thought Cyndi.

Asked is she was put off by Chris’ age and appearance, Cyndi said that didn’t bother her. Fortunately for Chris, she says she doesn’t judge a book by its cover. Cyndi did admit she was surprised that he had a religious front, but that his behavior was anything but religious. “I probably witnessed him breaking at least 5 of the 7 deadly sins, and that was in 2 weeks”.

She says Chris was too possessive and didn’t appreciate that she wasn’t looking for a long-term serious relationship. “In 20 years time he’ll dead, so I don’t think we’re a great match for something long term.” She was just looking to get f-c–d.

Cyndi is a liberal chick by her own admission, even writing on her MySpace page:

WHY CAN MEN SLEEP WITH A DIFFERENT GIRL EVERY NIGHT AND BE CALLED A PIMP. BUT IF A GIRL SLEEPS WITH A DIFFERENT GUY THEN THEY’RE WHORES. I THINK WHAT IS GOOD FOR ONE IS GOOD FOR THE OTHERS. BECAUSE IF IT WASN’T FOR THE DIFFERENT GIRLS THE GUYS COULDN’T BE PIMPS. AND IF IT WASN’T FOR GUYS GIRLS WOULDN’T BE CALLED WHORES. DO THE MATH. I THINK YOU SHOULD DO WHO AND WHAT YOU WANT AT THE TIME THAT YOUR IN. BECAUSE YOU CAN’T GO BACK TO IT

Anyone who posts this on their MySpace page is asking for a good pounding, thought Chris. He sent her an email in early December inviting her to meet up.

On their first date, Chris was kind enough to take her out for dinner. She says he was a bit old fashioned, but that she liked that. Later that night she went back to his place, and they had sex. Their sex life, she claims, was boring and often plagued with signs of old age. “He sometimes really struggled to keep it up”, she said. Young Cyndi just couldn’t feel fulfilled.

Their relationship, though, didn’t end due to Chris’ troubles in the bedroom, claims Cyndi. Chris wanted their relationship to be exclusive, and she didn’t. He would get very ratty when she would text other boys. “He was way too jealous for the stage we were at”, she claims.

Cyndia and Chris could have been America’s Hot New Couple of 2009. It’s a shame things didn’t work out.